7 Selected Jokes That Will Brighten Your Day

Sometimes we all need a little joy in our lives, and what's better than a few jokes over a hot beverage? Lucky for you, we have a complication right here!

Feeling down or just need a little pick-me-up? You're in luck! We've rounded up seven of the funniest jokes to tickle your funny bone and brighten your day. From forgetful seniors to witty kids, these stories are sure to bring a smile to your face.

Come on, grab a cup of coffee, sit back, and enjoy some light-hearted humor!

1. The Forgetful Couple

Look, old age is coming for us all. But an 80-year-old couple noticed that they were starting to forget things, so they decided to see their doctor for some advice. After a thorough check-up, the doctor reassured them.

"You're both in great shape for your age. I'm so impressed! But maybe try writing things down to help you remember?"

Feeling relieved, the couple headed home. Later that evening, as they were watching TV, the old man got up from his chair.

"Where are you going?" his wife asked.

"To the kitchen, darling," he replied.

"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?" she asked sweetly.

"Sure," he said, slipping his feet into his slippers.

"Maybe you should write it down, so you don't forget," she suggested.

"Nah, I've got it," he insisted.

"Suit yourself," she said. "But I'd also like some strawberries on top. Better write that down."

"I'll remember, darling," he said, slightly annoyed. "Ice cream with strawberries. Simple enough."

"And whipped cream," she continued. "I'm sure you'll forget my entire order if you don't write it down."

Now visibly irritated, he snapped, "I won't forget!"

After about twenty minutes, he came back with a plate of bacon and eggs. His wife stared at it for a moment and finally sighed deeply.

"Darling, you forgot my toast," she said.

2. The Sobering Juggler

A circus performer was speeding down the highway when a police officer pulled him over. As the officer began writing the ticket, she spotted several machetes on the back seat.

"What are those for?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm a juggler," he explained. "They're part of my act at the circus. I'm one of the lead performers!"

"Fine," the policewoman said. "But I want you to prove it to me."

She crossed her arms and looked intently at the performer.

The juggler got out of the car, grabbed the machetes, and began an impromptu performance. He started with three, then moved to five, and finally juggled seven machetes at once.

It was quite impressive! Overhand, underhand, and even behind his back.

"Okay, I believe you," the police officer said.

A passing driver did a double-take, watching in shock as he drove by.

"Oh man!" he exclaimed to himself. "I really need to lay off the booze. The sobriety tests are brutal these days!"

3. The Complimentary Nuts

A man walked into a bar and took a seat at the counter. As he sipped his drink, he heard a voice say,

"Wow, you look amazing today!"

Startled, he looked around, but the place was nearly empty. He shrugged it off and took another sip.

Then he heard it again.

"That's a fantastic shirt! You're absolutely glowing!"

Confused, he scanned the room again. No one. Then, he realized the voice was coming from a dish of nuts on the bar.

"Hey, bartender!" he called out. "What's going on with these nuts?"

"Oh, those?" the bartender chuckled. "They're complimentary nuts!"

4. The Bargaining Reindeer

One night, in a crowded southern bar, a reindeer strolled in, went up to the counter, and ordered a martini.

Casual.

The bartender, unperturbed, mixed the drink and took a twenty-dollar bill from the reindeer's hoof.

As he handed back the change, he remarked loudly,

"You know, I think you're the first reindeer I've ever seen in here."

The reindeer looked down at the small handful of change and grumbled, "Well, at these prices, I'm definitely the last."

5. The Savvy Kid at the Barber Shop

A young boy walked into the barber shop, and the barber whispered to his customer,

"Watch this; I'll show you the dumbest kid in the world."

The barber held up a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other.

"Which do you want, son?" he asked.

The boy took the two quarters and left.

"What did I tell you?" the barber laughed. "That kid never learns."

Later, as the customer was leaving, he saw the same boy coming out of an ice cream shop.

"Hey, kid," he asked. "Why did you take the fifty cents instead of the dollar?"

The boy licked his ice cream and grinned.

"Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"

6. The Suspicious Friends

Three friends were sitting at a bar when one of them, David, began to cry.

"What's wrong, David?" asked George, concerned.

David wiped his tears.

"I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. Last week, I found a pair of wire cutters under the bed, and they weren't mine."

George sighed and then turned to see Simon looking equally glum.

"What about you, Simon?" he asked. "What's got you down?"

"I think my wife is cheating with the plumber," Simon replied. "I found a wrench under the bed, and it wasn't mine either."

George finished his beer.

"Well, you guys won't believe this, but I think my wife is having an affair with a horse."

Both friends stared at him in disbelief.

"George, come on, this isn't the time for jokes," Simon said.

"No joke," George replied. "I came home yesterday and found a jockey under the bed."

7. The Fisherman's Catch

It was pouring rain outside an Irish pub, and a large puddle had formed just outside the door. An old man stood beside the puddle, dangling a piece of string in the water, moving it up and down.

A curious passerby, feeling a bit sorry for the old man, asked, "What are you doing?"

"Fishing," the old man replied, with a toothless grin.

"Poor soul," the gentleman muttered, feeling sorry for the man, so he invited him for a drink.

As they were sipping their whiskies, the gentleman tried to make conversation.

"So, how many have you caught today?"

The old man smiled.

"You're the eighth."

And there you have it, seven jokes to bring a little joy to your day. Whether it's the reindeer with expensive taste or the kid with a knack for keeping a good thing going, we hope these brought a smile to your face. Remember, laughter is the best medicine, so pass these along to a friend who could use a good chuckle today!

If you enjoyed this one, here's another article for you |

8 Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes about Kids You'll Want to Share

Children have an uncanny ability to turn even the simplest moments into something laugh-worthy. Their unique perspectives on the world often lead to situations that leave us in stitches, like in the following jokes.

From the cold soup situation to a permission dilemma, get ready to chuckle at these eight jokes that perfectly capture the comedy of childhood.

Joke 1: The Silent Critic

Imagine this: an eight-year-old boy who has never uttered a single word. His parents, naturally, are concerned. Doctors had run tests, specialists had been consulted, but the boy remained silent — until one ordinary afternoon, during lunch.

As he dipped his spoon into the bowl of soup, he paused, his tiny brow furrowing in concentration. Then, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, he turned to his mother and casually remarked, "The soup is cold."

His mother was stunned. She could hardly believe her ears. After years of silence, this was the first time her son had spoken! Overcome with emotion, she exclaimed, "Son, I've waited so long to hear you speak. But all these years, you never said a thing. Why haven't you spoken before?"

The boy, unfazed by the drama, shrugged and gave a simple reply: "Up until now, everything has been satisfactory."

It turns out, all this time, the boy had been perfectly content: just waiting for something worth commenting on!

Joke 2: The Mother's Day Surprise

Mother's Day is supposed to be a day of pampering and relaxation for moms everywhere. But for one mother, the day didn't go quite as expected.

Her two children, eager to do something special for her, ordered her to stay in bed that morning. She was delighted, imagining a luxurious breakfast in bed: perhaps pancakes, fresh fruit, maybe even a little mimosa.

The smell of bacon wafted up from the kitchen, making her mouth water. Surely, they were preparing something spectacular just for her.

She waited. And waited. But after a long stretch of silence, curiosity got the best of her, and she decided to investigate. When she finally ventured downstairs, she found her two children sitting at the table, happily munching on bacon and eggs.

"As a surprise for Mother's Day," one of them explained, beaming with pride, "we decided to cook our own breakfast!"

The mother couldn't help but laugh. Well, at least they tried!

Joke 3: The First Day of School

The first day of school is always nerve-wracking, and for one little boy, it was no different. As he prepared for this big milestone, his anxiety was palpable.

His father, noticing his worried expression, gently asked, "What's wrong, buddy?"

The boy hesitated, then looked up with wide, worried eyes. "How long do I have to go to school for?" he asked nervously.

His father smiled, remembering his own first-day jitters. "Until you're 18," he replied, trying to sound reassuring.

Read the full story here.

This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.

The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided "as is," and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.